The Monsters in My Closet

The Monsters in My Closet

BY PHIL BOLSTA
The monsters in my closet
Like to sleep the day away.
So when I get home from school,
I let them out to play.
When Mom calls me for supper,
I give them each a broom.
First they put my toys away,
And then they clean my room.
The Mummy hates to vacuum.
So if he starts to whine,
I kick his rear and tell him,
“Trade jobs with Frankenstein.”
Wolfman used to fold my clothes.
I’ll give him one more chance—
Last time he wasn’t careful
And left furballs in my pants.
When my room is nice and neat,
I bring them up some food.
But Dracula wants to drink my blood—
I think that’s pretty rude.
When it’s time to go to bed,
I hug them all goodnight.
They jump back in my closet,
While I turn out the light.
I’ve taken care of monsters
For as long as I recall,
But the monsters in my closet
Are the nicest ones of all!
Phil Bolsta, “The Monsters in My Closet” from Kids Pick the Funniest Poems, edited by Bruce Lansky (Minnetonka, Minn.: Meadowbrook Press, 1991). Copyright © 1991 by Phil Bolsta. Reprinted with the permission of the author.
Source: Kids Pick the Funniest Poems (1991)