On Mother’s Day
BY BRUCE LANSKY
On Mother’s Day it isn’t smart
To give your mom a broken heart.
So here are thing you shouldn’t say
To dear old mom on Mother’s Day:
Don’t tell here that you’ll never eat
A carrot, celery, bean, or beet.
Don’t tell her you think smoking’s cool.
Don’t tell her you’ve dropped out of school.
Don’t tell her that you’ve drowned the cat.
Don’t tell her that she looks too fat.
Dont’t tell her when you’re grown you’ll be
A starving poet—just like me.
Bruce Lansky, “On Mother’s Day” from If Pigs Could Fly—and Other Deep Thoughts: A Collection of Funny Poems. Copyright © 2000 by Bruce Lansky. Reprinted by permission of Meadowbrook Press.
Source: If Pigs Could Fly—and Other Deep Thoughts: A Collection of Funny Poems (Meadowbrook Press, 2000)